Reader Question:
My ex is an on-again, off-again fan who claims he’s “done” with me. Yet he stops by my personal workplace working nearly every time to inquire about some lame concern or kid myself about something. Away from work he can not answer any messages or mail, therefore I you should not deliver all of them anymore. Regrettably, I love him and he understands it.
If they have given up on you, why does the guy stop by my company? If they haven’t, precisely why will he maybe not communicate with me beyond work?
-Lucinda (New York)
Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Solution:
Dear Lucinda:
Your ex lover is actually connected however happy to take time to buy an union along with you.
Their check-ins at the office are made to help him maintain experience of you and maybe even maintain the intimate doors open. But he’s got managed to make it obvious he doesn’t want a relationship anymore. He’s said that.
These combined messages and flirting are most likely operating you bananas, which means you’ve got to end up being the someone to erect boundaries.
As he prevents by your workplace, end up being really busy and sidetracked. Transfer in the area if you possibly could. And, most importantly, don’t have gender with him!
My hunch: he or she is giving you incorrect desire because he really wants to manage to have on-again sex sometimes.
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